You may have heard it, you may have said it you're self, that lying to you self is the easiest person to lie to. If we don't lie to our self we then blame the situation or better still others for our own inaction. It is so easy to procrastinate by lying to our self, we need to get out and go for a walk of do something around the house, so we say to our self that it can be done tomorrow or I have something ells to do that is more important, or you don't want to miss a show on TV. I have told clients that I may be the only therapist that will quote Hitler in a therapeutic context. So I will quote him here and tell you the same thing. Hitler stated that the hardest war to fight is the war with your self. Likewise Frank Herbit in his Dune books stated something very similar, "When the mind commands the body there will be no resistance, but when the mind commands its self resistance comes all to easy". People with depression will be told by therapists to get out and walk, this is to get the body to work and to stop dwelling on unpleasant thoughts, also when walking the body starts to create all thous feel good chemicals. That is why some people feel addicted to jogging, it is not the jogging that they are wanting to do, it's the feel good chemicals that the body creates that they want. Like wise getting things done around the house can also create a feeling of accomplishment, again the dopamine pathways in the brain are being used to bring about those feel good chemicals. I know that you are saying, because I say those things to my self. I just don't feel like doing that stuff. At the moment the slave cylinder on my clutch is leaking like a sieve. The part has been ordered and I just have to wait for it, but in the mean time I have to top up the fluid every day and if I am not careful, I need to bleed the clutch, which I have done 5 times in the last 2 weeks. You know I lied to my self several times, well 5 times to be exact, some of the excuses you may have used your self. So some of the excuses were, I am having an interesting chat on facebook or skype, I am not going anywhere today I will look at the clutch tomorrow, I am to tiered because I have been on my feet all day, I don't need the car today I don't need to look at it, and finally, this documentary is so interesting. Its funny how work around the house has so much passions, we could learn from the dishes, they will sit in the sick and wait without making a sound passionately waiting till you wash them and put them away. Likewise, have you found the some books have a magical power to just drain you of all your energy, I sit down to study and Wow, I get so tiered, I start yarning and just want to go to bed for the next 5 years. So we end up cramming for the exam and do the essay two days before it's due. So again we lie to our self to get out of that stuff, thus the dishes and everything ells that is low on the list of priorities get done. We lie to our self to get out of work, house work, or what ever. So why can't we lie to our self to get them done. You will find that its only getting started that is the hard thing, once you have started the work you get stuck into it and you get the work done. It's just getting started that is so hard. I have used some lies on my self that seem to work, I would love to hear of your ways of kidding your self in getting started. For instance, I have just cleared my mind about the whole job and told my self to just check the flued then I go to the next step. So I don't do the big job in my mind I am doing a set of little jobs that are not hard. Another lie I use on my self to get a job done is to pretend that I am getting payed for the work, well that's not a big lie, I am actually saving my self money by doing it my self. Another one I use is that of pleasing another, my grandfather was a mechanic before he became an auctioneer, and taught me heaps about cars and trucks. So what I do is pretend that he is behind me helping me with the work and once it is done, we shake hands and pat me on the back. By the way he passed away about 15 years ago, but is still with me.
Blaming others is a great way of lying to your self. This works so well and is the best way to build excuses, that everyone does it in all walks of life from the leaders of the country to the long term unemployed. Fill in the blanks; "If it would not be for ………. I would have been able to do ……….". As a kid we try to blame the dog for eating the home work for school. After that time goes on and we get older and learn a whole heap of new excuses that are plausible. What blaming other does with great effect is to take all the focus off of you and places it on something ells or someone ells. Talking with other people that deal with addiction therapy, have stated that until a person stops diverting blame away from them self and owns the problem, recovery from addiction is a struggle and therapy will not work. When we own the issue and admit to our self that the problem was created by our own stupidity or lack of action recovery is far more likely. I remember that whenever I did something stupid that I paid for through pain or damage to stock that I purchased when I was an auctioneer working with my grandfather, he would always say, "Frank you need to think before you act, that's how you avoid stupidity". This posting follows from the last posting about creating your reality. Granted you must realise that this posting is not talking about accidents that were totally out of your control, such as being a victim of crime or an accident. But how you deal with the incident aftermath is in your control and the decisions you make to get your life back on track is your responsibility. Friends, family, and professionals are there to help, but even then they cannot do the job of helping if you blame your inaction on others and think they will make you better. Like the old saying goes, "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink". Every one around you may try to help you, but if you don't help yourself, they cannot make you help your self. This is the thing I encounter on a daily basses, ever time I am working with people with drug and alcohol addiction. So I hear the phrase a lot, "I am only doing this because of my family, partner, kids, work, or justice system". Over time the person starts to realise that if you don't do something for your self it won't be done. Thus they stop blaming others for their plight and start being involved in their own recovery. Here is another artical on this subject if you wish to read more:
Excuses, excuses, excuses: Why people lie, cheat, and procrastinate
You may have heard it, you may have said it you're self, that lying to you self is the easiest person to lie to. If we don't lie to our self we then blame the situation or better still others for our own inaction. It is so easy to procrastinate by lying to our self, we need to get out and go for a walk of do something around the house, so we say to our self that it can be done tomorrow or I have something ells to do that is more important, or you don't want to miss a show on TV. I have told clients that I may be the only therapist that will quote Hitler in a therapeutic context. So I will quote him here and tell you the same thing. Hitler stated that the hardest war to fight is the war with your self. Likewise Frank Herbit in his Dune books stated something very similar, "When the mind commands the body there will be no resistance, but when the mind commands its self resistance comes all to easy". People with depression will be told by therapists to get out and walk, this is to get the body to work and to stop dwelling on unpleasant thoughts, also when walking the body starts to create all thous feel good chemicals. That is why some people feel addicted to jogging, it is not the jogging that they are wanting to do, it's the feel good chemicals that the body creates that they want. Like wise getting things done around the house can also create a feeling of accomplishment, again the dopamine pathways in the brain are being used to bring about those feel good chemicals. I know that you are saying, because I say those things to my self. I just don't feel like doing that stuff. At the moment the slave cylinder on my clutch is leaking like a sieve. The part has been ordered and I just have to wait for it, but in the mean time I have to top up the fluid every day and if I am not careful, I need to bleed the clutch, which I have done 5 times in the last 2 weeks. You know I lied to my self several times, well 5 times to be exact, some of the excuses you may have used your self. So some of the excuses were, I am having an interesting chat on facebook or skype, I am not going anywhere today I will look at the clutch tomorrow, I am to tiered because I have been on my feet all day, I don't need the car today I don't need to look at it, and finally, this documentary is so interesting. Its funny how work around the house has so much passions, we could learn from the dishes, they will sit in the sick and wait without making a sound passionately waiting till you wash them and put them away. Likewise, have you found the some books have a magical power to just drain you of all your energy, I sit down to study and Wow, I get so tiered, I start yarning and just want to go to bed for the next 5 years. So we end up cramming for the exam and do the essay two days before it's due. So again we lie to our self to get out of that stuff, thus the dishes and everything ells that is low on the list of priorities get done. We lie to our self to get out of work, house work, or what ever. So why can't we lie to our self to get them done. You will find that its only getting started that is the hard thing, once you have started the work you get stuck into it and you get the work done. It's just getting started that is so hard. I have used some lies on my self that seem to work, I would love to hear of your ways of kidding your self in getting started. For instance, I have just cleared my mind about the whole job and told my self to just check the flued then I go to the next step. So I don't do the big job in my mind I am doing a set of little jobs that are not hard. Another lie I use on my self to get a job done is to pretend that I am getting payed for the work, well that's not a big lie, I am actually saving my self money by doing it my self. Another one I use is that of pleasing another, my grandfather was a mechanic before he became an auctioneer, and taught me heaps about cars and trucks. So what I do is pretend that he is behind me helping me with the work and once it is done, we shake hands and pat me on the back. By the way he passed away about 15 years ago, but is still with me. 
Blaming others is a great way of lying to your self. This works so well and is the best way to build excuses, that everyone does it in all walks of life from the leaders of the country to the long term unemployed. Fill in the blanks; "If it would not be for ………. I would have been able to do ……….". As a kid we try to blame the dog for eating the home work for school. After that time goes on and we get older and learn a whole heap of new excuses that are plausible. What blaming other does with great effect is to take all the focus off of you and places it on something ells or someone ells. Talking with other people that deal with addiction therapy, have stated that until a person stops diverting blame away from them self and owns the problem, recovery from addiction is a struggle and therapy will not work. When we own the issue and admit to our self that the problem was created by our own stupidity or lack of action recovery is far more likely. I remember that whenever I did something stupid that I paid for through pain or damage to stock that I purchased when I was an auctioneer working with my grandfather, he would always say, "Frank you need to think before you act, that's how you avoid stupidity". This posting follows from the last posting about creating your reality. Granted you must realise that this posting is not talking about accidents that were totally out of your control, such as being a victim of crime or an accident. But how you deal with the incident aftermath is in your control and the decisions you make to get your life back on track is your responsibility. Friends, family, and professionals are there to help, but even then they cannot do the job of helping if you blame your inaction on others and think they will make you better. Like the old saying goes, "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink". Every one around you may try to help you, but if you don't help yourself, they cannot make you help your self. This is the thing I encounter on a daily basses, ever time I am working with people with drug and alcohol addiction. So I hear the phrase a lot, "I am only doing this because of my family, partner, kids, work, or justice system". Over time the person starts to realise that if you don't do something for your self it won't be done. Thus they stop blaming others for their plight and start being involved in their own recovery. Here is another artical on this subject if you wish to read more: Excuses, excuses, excuses: Why people lie, cheat, and procrastinate 
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