Respecting others: Love and Fear in Obedience – Charming the Snake

I find that respect in others has its routes in the emotions that the powerful instil in the subordinate. The powerful demand respect, respect can be given back or not. It is the motivation of the given respect that dictates the core emotion, of either respect in fear or in love. Respect is the quality of attention, regard, or esteem one gives to another. This quality does not need to be balanced in power or quality of esteem. For instance a person that has the power to alter one's life at their whim may not deserve esteem, because that person has position power and abuses it to gain self-esteem. Thus the subordinate needs to give respect out of fear. When in doubt of the power or where you stand with that other person, logic would dictate that respect is given immediately, just as one would give respect to a snake, give it room and try to know whether there is danger or if understanding can be gained. We, humans know that the greatest threat to us in this age on modernity is not other creatures. The dangers lie in other humans, because we know that our motivations guide our actions, but we do not know the motivations of others. This is the respect out of fear. I consecrate here more on fear because that is where the world is acting out its control. This is the most practiced form of control over the longest amount of time. Used by religious groups of all types, political movements, and almost anyone that seeks riches through power. Money is a way of getting freedom, but the obsession with money creates slavery, and here in this slavery, fear of loss of all your possessions brings about a protection reflex. This fear of loss makes you instil fear in others so you can keep those possessions. When a person is in fear, they wish escape from the fear, though fear may also alter the behaviour to bring appeasement in the focus of fear. So the subordinate will to bring joy to the powerful so to avoid the negative hostile manifestation of that power. Avoidant behaviour is a way of controlling the self to control the feedback of others. Religion has used this fear in the population to instil fear of the Cop in the sky and the Hell below to have you control your behaviour to avoid the nasty consequences. Law is the same, we obey the rules of law so that we do not get incarcerated and shamed in society. Thus avoidant behaviour is a form of manipulation to charm the snake in your midst or the unknown person that you feel you need to appease. I the drug and alcohol field that I currently work in I see the affects of this prolonged stress of charming the snake. The addiction that a person has is a form of escape, most commonly seen in females that smoke cannabis or drink so they can put up with an abusive relationship. This also happens in males as well but not talked about, because the male is supposed to be always seen as the perpetrator.  Being in a relationship or working with the snake that needs charming is stressful and that stress needs to be released or subdued with drugs. The release of this stress is when the stress is taken home from work and let out on the people in the family. Or if it is a home it commonly comes out through addiction, otherwise it will come to work with you to manifest in controlling others and instilling fear in others at work. Charming the snake for a long time, the snake charmer gets to know the snake every well and can charm the snake with ease. There is an elution of friendship, and respect, but in reality the charmer knows the snake so well that the charmer can get the snake to do anything, but is always aware that the snake can bite and kill at any moment. Also the charmer watches every move of the snake so that the charmer does not get hurt. Psychologists call this; over sensitised, hyper-vigilant, or hyper-sensitised to another person. By demanding respect through fear will only exist when that focus of fear is present, and as the old saying goes, when the cat is away the mice will play. Thus when the partner, boss or co-worker is out of eye or ear shot, respect is gone. The emotional response to this fear is that there is no loyalty to the relationship or work place and the fearful will only go the extra mile if it is trough fear. Seeing fear in action looks like aggression and irritation, but what is wanted is to get out of the situation. Whereas respect out of love has it all, loyalty, obedience, going the extra mile and positive regard are present. This does not mean that the respectful person is doing these things out of duress or doing things that they do not wish do whatever. They do it because they want to, furthermore the esteemed one will not ask the respectful to do anything that the respectful does not wish to do. This is very much like the final speech in Shakespeare's "Taming of the Shrew", where the Shrew states that a hand should be placed under the husbands feet, this is because she knows that he will never ask it for respect through love. If a person loves society, the laws will be respected and obeyed because they know that breaking the law would cause harm to the self or others. Likewise a person in love with God, does not need any threat of hell, but will live with love to all beings because they know that they are all God's children or aspects of God incarnate just as you are.